If we've learnt anything from talking to beautiful woman (and constantly being rejected by them) over the years, it's that chat-up lines are generally a no-go area.

Unless you're Ryan Gosling and have enough jokey charisma to start your own religion, the chances are if you go straight in with 'the line,' you're going to end up spooning your pillow before the night comes to an end.

As our Dad once told us, the real key to talking to beautiful woman is: "Confidence and being yourself. But not so much like yourself that you're creepy. Because you're usually quite creepy."

Here are ten doozies that you should never use, ever. And for those of you that do, learn and adapt, fellas...

10 The opportunist


09  The show off


08  The 'hillarious' cheeky chappychat-up-line-01

 07  The smarmy confident one


06  The slightly creepy twist on the classic


05 The borderline casual racism one


04 The straight to the point one


03  The 'I'm charming and nerdy' one


02 The (dated) popular culture lover


01 The 'are you actually serious?' one

Check out FHM's sex tips for men, as told by ladies.

Find out how to pull on Twitter by super hot model, Ellis Cooper.