Iceland (the country, not the shop) has announced that it's considering steps to place a national ban on internet pornography. The immediate and obvious implications of this are that single Icelanders will have to be a lot more imaginative in keeping warm on those cold, nordic nights. Even more startling though is the fact that there are now reports that the UK could follow suit.

Shocking stuff we know, but could it actually work? Or is it, as we suspect, every man's digital doomsday scenario?

Why it’s a terrible idea

Who decides what’s actually porn and where do we draw the line? Are topless movie scenes OK? What about buxom girls coating themselves in custard? Worst still, could those sexy selfies you’ve been emailing your girlfriend now land you in prison? What do we class as harmless erotica and what do we class as hardcore, in your face (probably) pornography? It’s a big smutty tightrope that’s going to be impossible to figure out.
 
People will get porn from weirder places. Banning things has never really stopped anything, without online access we’ll just be reduced back to a time where the only way to get porn was by buying it from beneath the counter in a dodgy 24-hour garage or finding soiled smut mags in park bushes. Which is horrible.

We’ll become awful at sex. Before porn was readily available there were only two sex positions known to man. Since the advent of the porn generation we’ve been spoilt for choice and sex is miles more interesting. Whether you’re a porn lover or not, you can’t say it hasn’t made you up your game in the bedroom, and that’s awesome.

What will all the porn stars do now? We’re in the middle of an economic crisis, surely the last thing we want to do is make even more people unemployed. Porn is pretty much the only business that’s constantly thriving and bringing money in, let’s keep it that way.

Why it could be a good thing

You’ll literally never be caught with your pants down. We’ve all been there, it’s 2:30 in the morning, you think everyone’s asleep so you plug in the laptop and say hello to fleshtown. Before you know it you’re playing human wack-attack at record-breaking speed, then all of a sudden there’s a creaking door and your mum/girlfriend/dad/housemate is no longer speaking to you. There aren’t many situations quite as awkward. At least this way we know it’ll never happen.

Teenagers will go out more. Generally speaking, teenage years are spent not talking to your parents, writing awkward guitar-led poetry and wanking. If we can at least eliminate the latter there’s a chance teens will go out a bit more and develop real social skills instead of just looking pale and angsty all of the time.

We’ll stop having unrealistic/painful sex.
Before porn we had nice normal sex and that was just fine. These days we try so hard to ‘do it’ right that embarking on a nookie session without a pulley system and full cardio warm-up leaves you physically (and occasionally emotionally) crippled the next day. Sex should be fun and leave you feeling warm and fuzzy, not like you’ve just had an intense workout with a bunch of sweary marines.

What do you think, would your life be better or worst without porn? Let us know in the comments below or tweet us @fhm