We asked you, the lovely FHM readers, for pictures of your Halloween costume creations, and boy oh boy did you deliver. Here's the pick o' the bunch:
Delena Tango/Grim Fandango
We don't know if her eyes always look like that, but we're sure as hell not keen to find out.
John Ellerby/Born in Hell(erby)
Here's a picture of John Ellerby from Edinburgh and his girlfriend Gemma Veitch from Reading on their way to a pal's fancy dress party. Anyone that brings pickled onions to a party is welcome at ours anytime.
Harry Woodman/No Jokes for her
Harry Woodman "had a night in the town as the Joker :D".
We had a night on the town, too. It was great. We met this really hot dark-haired girl in a purple dress at about 2 in the morning. Let's just say things got a bit 'ghoulish'. Some of the stuff we got up to was... wait... hang on... *shudders, stares blankly, starts scrubbing body ferociously*
Want to recreat the look? You can bag yourself an official Joker make-up kit right here.
Paul Baker/We'll never be able to unsee this
This is Paul Baker and a pal "holding the famous Sooty and Richard hostage". This photo's got everything, really. Colour coordination, a famous bear puppet, two human pumpkins, and the BIGGEST MAMELTOE THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN.
Somebody called 'Igarza' who looks a bit like Kim Kardashian sent in these two pictures. We were a bit like "hmm these aren't very Halloweeny but then we saw the skull and everything was okay again".
Kevin Mills/Helium pays the bills
Kevin Mills from Twickenham sent in this charming concoction. We think somebody's been reading our November issue (see below).
If you were stuck for inspiration, here’s some ideas for next year, featuring UK rapper Fem Fel and workie Chris Smith:
THE UK RIOTS
Fem says: “I’m pretty pleased with this one cause I’ve got a bag of rice to share with all my new friends.”
FHM says: Too soon? We say, “Naaaah”, because you aren’t a rioter, noooo – you are the riots. You are a figurative representation of the polemic chaos and the socially disenfranchised, or some guff like that. A metaphor. An iconic symbol. Plus: melted trainers LMAO.
You need: Assorted melted trainers and toy cars, £1, Poundland; value basmati rice, £4, Tesco
Fem says: “I feel inspired. I am really getting into character. I don’t know who these guys stuck to me are, but they seem alright.”
FHM says: There’s nothing chicks dig more than a bit of casual wordplay. OK, so there probably is, but if you get enough people pointing at you going, “Aaaah I get it” you’ll end up comparing yourself with Shakespeare – if, you know, Shakespeare had waltzed around covered in novelty cereal and pictures of Harold Shipman.
You need: Cereal boxes, £2, Tesco; broken knife, found in kitchen; fake blood, £13, Angels fancy dress (fancydress.com)
MR JELLY FROM PSYCHOVILLE
Workie Chris says: “I love these shoes. They’re practical, comfortable and a great conversation starter.”
FHM says: There is no scarier or grumpier wonky-faced, one-handed unemployed clown, except maybe Abu Hamza. Mr Jelly isn’t your run of the mill party clown – he’s terrifying. Good for make-up amateurs, as it requires little-to-no skill to apply.
You need: Sinister clown costume, £34, clown shoes, £16, face paint, £4.50, hook, £5, all Angel’s fancy dress (fancydress.com); two afro kinky puff wigs, £15, Sensationnel (sensationnel.com); swimming hat, £4, Speedo; red lipstick and liquid eyeliner, free, sister
ARON RALSTON FROM 127 HOURS
Fem says: “I think I’d be more afraid if this hand was my real hand ’cause it’s white.”
FHM says: Severed limbs and epic use of fake blood are great building blocks for any Halloween ensemble. Add drama and authenticity by appearing constipated at all times. We will confess that giving Fem Fel a white hand did raise continuity issues. But you live and learn.
You need: Rock, from garden; pen knife, £15, Millets; arm, £9, Angels fancy dress (fancydress.com); head torch, £8, Decathlon; fake blood, £13, Angels fancy dress (fancydress.com); neckerchief, model’s own
THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE
Chris says: “I’ve never had anything bandaged to my bumhole before.”
FHM says: Advantage – by far the easiest to throw together. Disadvantage – you might want to wear a coat to your party. As soon as you take it off, though – BAM! – you’re a scantily clad artistic mastermind with an in-depth knowledge of grotesque horror films. Plus, you get your goodies on full show. Ideal for the perverted, or those with good goodies.
You need: Blow up dolls (no holes), £12 each, fake blood, £13, both Angels fancy dress (fancydress.com); bandages, £2.50, Superdrug; pants, £5, TKMaxx