Let’s be honest, the Christmas family meal is something that is often enjoyed and endured in equal measure.

Spice things up by playing along with FHM’s family Christmas drinking game and the hours will fly by… because you’ll probably wind up unconscious.


Your 17-year-old cousin briefly looks up from his or her WhatsApp chat, Candy Crush game or Snapchat session. One drink

You offer a lighter to set the Christmas pudding on fire and immediately realise you’ve accidentally outed yourself as a smoker to your parents. Two drinks

A tired child falls asleep with their face in the bread sauce because they’ve been awake since 4am. One drink

Your grandmother alludes to her own mortality, making everyone go silent immediately. Three drinks

Your dad tells his favourite offensive joke. One drink (bonus drink if he’s the only person who laughs)

A conversation about politics between two uncles devolves into a fist-fight about whether Britain’s “full” or not. One drink

Someone eats the last Golden Barrel in the Cadbury Roses. Drink all the alcohol, swear, flee the country.

Happy drinking.

Need to load up on some awesome beer? Check out the winners of the 2014 FHM Craft Beer Awards