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Land rover sport

The fine people at Land Rover invited FHM to razz their new, 75-grand beast through Welsh forests, an army mine field, a muddy stream, and a hollowed-out interior of a Boeing 747.

Naturally we took them up on their offer.

And what did we learn? Here’s what, in five easy-to-remember points…

1. This is the ultimate man’s car

Sure, a Bugatti Veyron might be a beautiful machine. But you can’t really call a car ‘manly’ if its arse gets scraped going over a speed bump.

We drove the new Range Rover Sport over some lumps and bumps, up a practically-vertical muddy bank, across a tree trunk, and through a fast flowing stream, without either us or the car metaphorically breaking a sweat.

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2. It’s engineered by the Brits and it can take on ANYTHING

Get ready to have a patriotic tear in your eye; the new Sport is a triumph of British engineering.

The range–topping V8 petrol does 155 mph, thanks to an aluminium body which is 33% lighter than the old model. The fact it can do 0-60 in 5 seconds flat is rather nice, too. 

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3. It’s got a West Midlands accent

Well, the people who thought up, designed and built this incredible vehicle have. The car was conceived at the Land Rover HQ in Warwickshire and glued together in their Solihull plant.

It might be Indian-owned, and a lot of these machines will never get properly mucky, spending their lives instead on Beijing highways, but this is still a very British success story. And that’s something to be proud of.

4. The supercharged petrol model will cause a tingle in your pants while others soil theirs

Those of you with sense will gravitate towards the 3.0 V6 Diesel version but you really can’t beat the supercharged 5.0 V8 for the roar it pumps out of its rear when you put pedal to the metal.

You may well kill a penguin and melt an ice cap in the process, but it’ll put a smile on your face that not even the untimely passing of a family pet could wipe off.

5. You can drive it through an obstacle course in a plane

Chances are you’ll never actually do this. But the important thing is that you could if you wanted to.

Words by Joe Barnes.