The Cannes Film Festival finished this weekend. Honestly, it was full of films that you're never going to watch – the big prize was won by something called Uncle Boonmee, which just sounds like a mildly sinister children's party entertainer - but it was also full of Cheryl Cole. And Cheryl Cole is always worth watching.

Cheryl wasn't in a film but that did not stop her walking down a red carpet while wearing some very sexy take on that funny bandagey costume that Milla Jovovich wore in The Fifth Element. Look, it shows more skin than dress and it gives a glimpse of that tattoo at the top of her thigh. This is a dress that knows what it's doing.

If the Cannes judges had decided to break the rules and give the top award to Cheryl instead people might have actually cared. And then Cheryl would have made a speech in a thick geordie accent and the French would have got all confused and looked at each other all, like, 'quoi?'. That would have been good

(UPDATE: Junior writer Tom Howard says Cheryl was in Cannes mid-last week and that these pictures are a bit old. Turns out Tom Howard should just shut the hell up)

Four highlights from FHM's Cheryl Cole archive:

1/ Cheryl Cole's new L'Oreal ads are ace

2/ 2010's sexiest calendars

3/ 100 Sexiest Women: The top 10

4/ What rudeness is Cheryl Cole up to?