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Linni Meister — Survival guide

Linni Meister
"Sex and food was all we had in common."
Full name: Linn Irene Meister
DOB: April 12, 1985
Place of birth: Haugesund, Norway
Occupation: Model, Singer

Linni Meister facts

  • Linni is FHM Norway’s sex columnist. And since being on their version of Survivor, has launched a singing career.

  • Her singing voice is a strange hybrid of Smurf and Chipmunk.

  • There is a sex tape of her in existence, involving a romp with another reality TV contestant. You’d think they were desperate for fame, or something.

  • She measures up at 36-23-34. If you were wondering.


Why we love Linni Meister

FIRST APPEARED IN FHM NORWAY

What the hell are you up to, Linni? Skipping work at FHM to just lounge back on a tropical beach? Don't you love us anymore?
Aw, stop it ... A girl have to be able to try something new. I'll always come back to you! And with a nice tan too.

Under the circumstances, we'll just have to accept your application for a leave of absence. You've already been there anyway, so there's not much we can do. Did you have a good time, then?
Well, that depends on your definition of a good time. If a good time to you is living on a deserted island without food for an extended period of time, then that's your business.

GREAT! So once again we'll have to endure this endless chatter about food supplies on Survivor. I mean, how hard can it be?
Awfully sorry, but that's just the way the song goes. You simply can't think about anything else. Sex and food is also the only two thing the participants usually have in common, so those two are pretty natural subjects for conversation.

Yeah, the sex thing we can understand. You were probably the center of attention down there, then? You being the "sex expert" and everything.
Well ... We all have sex, so most of them had something to bring to the table. But obviously, I wasn't exactly left at the sidelines without anything to add.

But speaking about sex: was it all talk on that island or what?
Someone on there masturbated at least. I, on the other hand, didn't even think about it. I thought the lack of sex would get to me a lot more than it really did.

Wowsers .. So it really went down when you came back to the old country, then?
Tee hee ... I didn't exactly throw myself at the first one that came along. I have some self control, thank you. So it actually took a little while from getting home to getting it on.

Oh dear ... And here we thought that you'd be completely starved. But speaking about sex. Again. You didn't use the opportunity on the beach to do another sex video? After all, you've got some experience in that field, don't you? We're referring to a sordid video with you and another Norewegian reality show-participant, that circulated around the web a little while ago. From what we've heard. Obviously we don't watch those sort of things. We are gentlemen, after all.
Oww ... I thought I was finished with that business. People started talking about that on the island as well. That film with me and Kristian was never, never meant to be viewed publicly. Believe me, if I was to make something like that on purpose, it would have been a much better movie than that! And I can promise you that I'll never tape myself having sex again! Never again. And if I ever get hold of the guy who stole my camera and put the movie out there ... He'll feel the wrath!

But you won't stop having sex?
No, THAT is one thing I won't be quitting anytime soon.

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