You know: Californication. The American TV programme that stars Mulder (David Duchovny to only his closest allies) and an American lady called Eva Amurri who, we’ll admit, until we heard about her doing this ‘ere striptease we didn’t know much about. Well not anymore. Here’s what we’ve got:

1/ A video of her striptease, above. It's amazing.

2/ An Eva Amurri covergirl profile. It's amazing.

3/ An Eva Amurri gallery. It's amazing.

Thank us later. We like pork pies. And scotch quails eggs. Preferably warm and with a runny yolk, but if you could sort out some kind of whiskey and mustard dip that would be fine too.