Remember Jennifer Ellison? Remember Paul Danan? Remember that time you wished Jennifer Ellison and Paul Danan would make a Daz advert together because it would confirm for you that the world we live in is a terrible place and provide all the required motivation to build a spaceship? Well the dream has become a reality and the reality is horrid. Watch it, go on. And then watch it again.

Jennifer Ellison seems like a nice person, so when we were having a little knock about on the internet earlier and read that, in 1997, on “choosing to pursue a professional career in dance, she successfully auditioned for the Royal Ballet Lower School, but was asked to leave due to her large bust which ruined her chances for classical ballet” it made us feel a bit sorry for her.

Then, when we read that “Ellison featured in the Liverpool Empire Theatre's Christmas Pantomime Cinderella for 2008 opposite Cilla Black and Les Dennis” we realised it’s tempting to conclude that things haven’t gone exactly as planned since she left Brookside in 2003. But who knows, maybe she loves those guys and who are we to tell her she’s wrong. She definitely is though. Those guys suck. Especially Les Dennis. He’s about 2/10.

We don't give a shit about Paul Danan.