Mum’s been at the pink gin again! Yes, the delightfully chesty, Caledonian goddess and Queen of breakfast telly has undergone a radical make-over to make herself look the princess of pop, Lady Gaga. The 50-year-old institution recreated one of Gaga’s mental outfits from the video for her latest single Telephone. “I love the Gaga! I love someone that just has fun and takes things to the extreme. She appeals to everyone and is so inspiring. We should all dress like Gaga - the world would be a better place.' Sure it would Lorraine, sure it would.

Despite her visions of a multi colored utopia, Lorraine will never resort to surgery. “After all the people I’ve interviewed where it’s all gone horribly wrong, I’ve been put off for life. If someone wants to do it, that’s fine. But I would say go to someone who knows what they’re doing. Too many people look odd. Why would you inject poison into yourself to ruin yourself?”


And quite right too. The Dundee United fan has become legend among the unemployed and early rising students of the nation for her friendly cleavage that will not succumb to gravity. Our Lorraine revealed she’s still particularly happy with her heaving cleavage. “They’re not bad. They’re still perky which I’m lucky for. They’re holding up quite well.”