Orlando Bloom became an overnight, international hero on Wednesday after taking a swing at Justin Bieber. Apparently, the little tyke made a rude comment about Bloom's ex-missus, the outrageously stunning Miranda Kerr.
Biebs responded to the stormy internet chaos like a natural born bellend by posting this picture of Orlando "crying."
(Let's all just pretend we haven't seen that insane fan's Hitler comment...)
Meanwhile, Miranda responded with a couple of lovely, topless Instagrams.
We're sure there's no intention behind it but it does certainly whiff a little of "Damn right they fought over me!"
Now, we could all sit around going "Oooh, how will Orlando respond to Justin's Insta-bants?" and "That Bieber, eh? What a little scrote." But, the truth is, we don't really care.
Instead, here are 17 reasons why Miranda Kerr has that kind of Helen of Troy-esque power to send every man on the planet batshit, fisticuff crazy: