Audrina Patridge, bikini model and “reality” TV superstar, is 26. Unlike most people who are 26, she celebrated this fact with a massive pool party in Las Vegas.

Can you remember your 26th birthday party? Maybe you can’t. Maybe you’re not actually 26 yet (enjoy yourself, you young scamp, just you wait until you get proper hangovers – it’s like having all your teeth removed and replaced with nail files) or maybe your 26th birthday went by in an alcoholic blur.

Or maybe you just don’t have a very good memory. It’s alright – your 26th birthday isn’t very remarkable, save for the fact that it’s the first one where the reality of age hits home like a sack of wet porridge. Up until the age of 25, you can’t wait to get older, and past that – well, it’s all downhill from there.

We’re not bitter. We’re not bitter AT ALL. Just see if you can detect any hint of bitterness whatsoever in the rest of this cheery, happy-go-lucky article.

 Audrina Patridge at her 26th birthday party in Wet Republic
We think this is some kind of VIP pool, or VIPP for short

Audrina Patridge, then, kept the numbing reality of death at bay by holding a big pool party. Go her. There was a cake, and sparklers, and dancing, and all sorts of fun that absolutely didn’t underline the stomach-turning fact that she’s taking the first steps out of youth and trudging stolidly and irrevocably towards middle age.

Also there were several hot bikini models, which we’re more impressed with. We especially like how the one on the far left at the top of the article looks like Jessica Simpson crossed with an Amazon warrior.

Here she is enjoying a cake – a cake without 26 candles, note – and dancing around at a bar/club affair called Wet Republic, presumably named on account of the fact that it seems to have more pools than your average club. Although everything’s different in Vegas, so who knows?