May 1 is the most exciting date in FHM's 2013 calendar for two reasons:
1. It's the night we reveal who wins FHM 100 Sexiest Women In The World 2013.
2. It's the night of the FHM 100 Sexiest Women In The World 2013 PARTY, which means that we get to spend the evening rubbing shoulders (alas, only shoulders) with quite literally the world's sexiest women.
Here's what went down.
FHM favourite Gemma Atkinson showed the red carpet newbies how it's done and showed Angelina Jolie how to flash a bit of thigh.
Helen Flanagan is officially the Sexiest Woman in the UK. How do we know? Because she made our photographer lose all sense of balance.
FHM Girlfriends Mel, Bryony and Lois put on their prettiest party dresses and nearly knocked the wind out of us.
Inbetweeners favourite Emily Atack showed us her sexiest duck face. We're still not convinced it will catch on.
Hollyoaks girls Jorgie Porter, Gemma Merna and Wallis Day went wild on their girls' night out.
Here's Gemma in action with FHM Deputy Editor Dan:
We're not allowed to tell you what went down after that, but Dan was promptly ejected from the premises.
Natasha Hamilton took some time out from reforming Atomic Kitten to put her hands up for Detroit.
Sky Sports presenter and FHM cover star Charlie Webster let her competitive side get the better of her and challenged everyone who would listen to a wheelbarrow race.
FHM Web Editor Jordan put the moves on Georgia Salpa. If you look closely, you can actually see her skin crawling.
Laura Whitmore won the award for Sexiest Woman on Telly and it got host Chris Ramsey's back up just a tad.
Helen Flanagan was just about to give her acceptance speech for winning Sexiest Woman in the UK, until she was interrupted by everyone pointing and cheering at the couple having sex on the second floor behind her. Really.
Mila Kunis, looking slimmer than usual, collected her award for Sexiest Woman in the World. She told us, "I never thought I was cut-out to be sexy." We LOLed.
We'd tell you more but, once she came off stage, Mila got the whole crowd doing shots and, well, debauched doesn't quite cover the events that proceeded.
Cheers to our friends over at VO5 Extreme Style for supporting the 100 Sexiest campaign yet again. And big up to Arena Flowers for providing the glorious bouquets for our sexy prize winners. If you visit their site, use the promo code "welcome" and you'll get an exclusive 20% off your first order. Treat yo mama.