In a weird way which we'll try to explain but probably just leave you feeling confused and afraid, Blake Lively is like a naughty schoolgirl.
Last night, the 23-year-old American actress and model wore a very short dress to the CinemaCon Awards in Las Vegas. This sort of thing is normally encouraged; Blake Lively has lovely long legs and it's nice to let them roam free, like an energetic horse galloping around the New Forest to its heart's content. But, like the skirts of thousands of teenage girls pushing the school uniform boundaries on a daily basis, Blake Lively's outfit of choice was deemed a bit too short.
We think your dress is nice, Blake. You look like one of those toilet roll dolls. But sexy
Somone was all, "Jesus, Blake, that dress is a bit short, isn't it?"
And she was all, "What? No, it's fine. It's nice. And look at my legs - they look gooooood".
And the other person went: "Yeah, sure, they do. But it's just not on. Go and get changed or we're going to send you home and then put you in detention for a week".
So Blake said: "Aw man, this sucks," and stomped off to get changed.
But, while she was getting changed, she was still fuming. "Bloody people, always telling me what to do," she grumbled to herself. She was probably listening to some female empower-rock like Pink or Bjork and, as she rocked out and thrashed her hair around like a wild horse with a bumblebee in its mane, she decided "Fuck it, I'll show them - I WILL get changed, but into a dress that's just as short".
And so she rocked up in this little number:
"Oh, too short again, is it? Well SCREW YOU! YOU DON'T OWN ME! ARGH!"
So there you go, dress-fascists, Blake Lively cannot be controlled by your despotic regime. So stick it up your baggy jumper and leave us to wear all the short dresses we like.