Can you recall the last time that you forgot to put your boxer shorts on before leaving the house? Don’t scoff; it’s a legitimate question. Actually, stuff that; do scoff, because it’s ridiculous, right? You get out of the shower, you dry yourself and you put on your pants and socks. Then you put on the rest of your clothes and then you head to work. And that’s it. That’s your dressing plan. It’s simple, it’s straightforward and it’s unf***upable. Or is it?


Peanut smuggling: sexy

We added the tantalising end to that paragraph, because, as you can see, last night, sensational American supermodel-turned-actress Brooklyn Decker trod the red carpet in Berlin without a bra. Ooh, saucy. It was, but it was also a flesh-flashing act that saw her join the likes of Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton in the ever-growing band of ‘female celebrities who have forgotten to put their underwear on before leaving the house’.

Intrigued by this trend, we polled the women of the office to see whether any of them had ever forgotten to put on their bra or pants before walking out of their house. None had, but… a few had tactically “chosen” to go without in a bid to “excite their other half”.

Ah, so that’s what Brooklyn was up to. She was sending a sexy message to her husband. A message that stated, start limbering up Roddick, because my gravity-defying side boob and I are coming to get you, which, thinking about it, sure as hell beats most of the drunken booty texts we receive.

And talking of drunken texts, have you sent any lately? If so, forward them to us, because a) we need a Tuesday morning pick-me-up and b) we’d like to feature them on our letters page.


Shoe Strap did the splits