Not many people in this world can legitimately claim to be legends of their genre in life. Johnny Marr can, because he was the lead guitarist in The Smiths and therefore invented jangly British indie. Bob Woodward and Carle Bernstein can, because they implicated President Richard Nixon in the Watergate scandal and now Woodward’s gone and released a book that’s an insider tale about White House discussions on the Iraq War. Jay-Z can, because everyone in the world likes hip-hop because of him. Alfred Hitchcock can, because he established the blueprint for making cinematic thrillers that everyone now follows.

Keeley Hazell can, because the 24-year-old from Bromley is the most famous, successful and popular modern day glamour model. A budding actress that at least three ex-members of FHM’s staff would have gouged out their own eyes to peck her on the cheek who's about to appear in a film called Venus & The Sun. A titan of Page 3. A heroic ambassador for being curvaceous. A female once described by David Cameron as an “environmental hero” for telling readers of The Sun to turn off their light switches during the day to save electricity. A busty angel sent to earth to do not a lot but look amazing:

A plump-lipped siren with the necessary attributes to make grown men flit from tears to laughter with a flick of her brown hair:

A soft-skinned beauty who looks likes she smells of potpourri:

A sweet young lady in a black bikini: