Britain’s ‘Sexiest Actress’ Kara Tointon turned up at BBC HQ yesterday for the launch show of Strictly Come Dancing. She was sweating from both armpits, but it was significantly more noticeable on the left side because that’s the way her blue dress was cut. The former Eastenders star, who in that glorious summer of 2009 revealed to FHM that she used to shove chicken fillets down her front to play busty Dawn Swann, stole the headlines from fellow contestants Tina O’Brien, Michelle Williams, Patsy Kensit, Pamela Stephenson, Felicity Kendall and the Right Honourable Anne Widdecombe.
Kara’s evidently been working hard in the gym in preparation for filming. Imagine that. Imagine being the man stood behind the cross trainer operated by the woman who knows that very soon the entire nation will see the curvature of her buttocks in HD. Then imagine Kara Tointon in lingerie. Then look at these pictures of Kara Tointon in lingerie. Wahey! Didn’t we do well. Yes, we did. That’s what we do here – excellent stuff. Er, look! Kara Tointon being busty in Eastenders!
So, what else? There must be something else. Do you like her dress? Do you think it’s sexy? Do you like the colour? Which deodorant do you use? It it an aerosol? Do you worry about global warming? Anne Widdecombe doesn’t. Anne Widdecombe’s a self-styled global warming heretic. She wants people to BACK THE FUCK OFF in a world where, “those who dare to dissent are treated with about as much respect as Galileo was by the medieval church.” She’s got a point, you know. Anyone interested should check out Nigel Lawson’s book An Appeal to Reason, who points out that the difference between the temperature in Finland and that in Singapore is massive, but in both countries people thrive and so do their economies.
Sexy celebrity news on FHM.com:
1/ Ashley Greene and Miley Cyrus got wet
2/ Michelle Keegan at the TV Choice awards
3/ Katie Price's iPod tiara is super naff
Kara Tointon for FHM:
Kara Tointon gallery: