We probably don't give Leona Lewis her fair dues on these pages. What with those Victoria's Secret models getting all the attention nowadays, and with the added pressure of having to show you Ann Widdecombe in another sexy number on Strictly Come Dancing every week, we've sadly neglected her. So we apologize. Because not only is she possibly the sole X Factor winner who's lasted more than two months before returning to obscurity, she also has a smouldering, mysterious allure which both fascinates and intimidates us in equal measure, quite frankly.
Just in case you're wondering, the hat, unlike most other accessories in today's world, wasn't a fashion statement. She was at the new ice rink outside the Natural History Museum in London for the Xbox 360 Kinect gig, so it must've been pretty chilly to say the least. Visitors to the museum were stunned on seeing Leona there. One of them (an American), while en route to the palaeontology section, enquired whether she was the only one left of her kind in existence. When an official replied in the affirmative, the tourist took it upon himself to attempt a rescue of Leona for conservation purposes. Needless to say, he was put on the next plane back to Kansas.
Here she is without any form of headgear whatsoever, just for comparison. As we said before, smouldering. Even her mole looks good, having mutated perfectly into the shape of a star. Why can't ours do that? As of last week, it is now a metre in diameter and the hair growing out of it requires its own barber. Come to think of it, we should probably get that checked out.