Megan Fox made a film called The Passion Play with Mickey Rourke and Bill Murray. By all accounts, it was pretty awful, but she’s topless in it so hey ho. Why not watch this video of her (covered) topless scene?

If Mickey Rourke says your film is bad, you’ve got to be pretty sure that it’s not very good. Especially when he’s in the damn thing. Well, Mickey Rourke said that The Passion Play was bad, and we’re inclined to agree with him.

Megan Fox and Mickey Rourke in The Passion Play
We just have this feeling

We haven’t seen it – nor are we sure entirely how to, although apparently it’s been released on DVD somewhere – but it’s been universally panned by critics and taken almost no money from box office sales. In fact, Hobo with a Shotgun (a no-budget grindhouse flick, based off a trailer à la Machete, starring Rutger Hauer) made more money in the opening weekend according to the film’s Wikipedia article.

Which is a shame, but apparently deserved. Oh well. Megan plays a freakshow attraction in the film – a woman with wings! – who seems to spend the entire thing stood in a glass box. Perhaps it’s a commentary on her representation in the media as an beautiful yet untouchable other, equally cursed and blessed with an appearance which grants her endless opportunities but pigeonholes her into a distant, almost alien archetype.

Mickey Rourke and Bill Murray in The Passion Play
Even Bill Murray couldn't save this. And he made Garfield watchable. You know, if you were drunk

Or maybe the screenwriter just couldn’t write female parts. We don’t know. We don’t especially care. To be honest, if your film involves Bill Murray getting punched in the face, we’re already against you. That man is an absolute don.