Look who’s at it again. It’s serial sexy offender, Australian super model and 27-year-old mother to be, Miranda Kerr. Here she is, getting another shoot for Victoria’s Secret under her belt. She must have loads now. Loads and loads. Loads and loads and loads. So what are you’s guys up to at the weekend?

Did anyone see The Apprentice last night? Ace wasn’t it? What a shower of idiots. We read a thing about it earlier on by a women called Lucy Sweet, she is very, very funny. Here is an extract. “There’s a horrible inevitability to the Apprentice. It just happens without you really wanting it to, like Christmas, or a smear test. Every year, every single braying arse wipe you’ve ever overheard on the train yelling ‘Look Geoff, it’s a no brainer’ applies for the show. Every Autumn, Sir Alan finishes shaving his forehead, puts down his copy of Razzle, adjusts his tie and welcomes them all into his boardroom. In a Nuremberg rally of black Burton suits and grey jackets from Mango, they shuffle in, plopping pellets of misplaced self-confidence all over his shiny floor. They are 110% committed. To being c**ts. This year Alan’s acolytes are sweeping the board when it comes to supreme c**tiness.

There is one called Raleigh, who is a posh c**t. A ruddy-cheeked Billy Bunter bozo named Stuart Baggs, who is the cunt you’ll love to hate. And Alex Epstein, a sad, deluded cunt who will touch the nation with his complete and utter fucking uselessness. Then there are the women business bots, programmed by Robert Palmer, who look cool and in control until they open their mouths, when they sound Janine Butcher and Bianca Mitchell fighting over a fag end. Apart from the girl who looks like the blonde one from the Human League, they were so boring that my brain couldn’t take them in.”

Read more of Lucy’s stuff, she is good. Look at more of Miranda Kerr below.