In case you didn’t already know, Miranda Kerr (you know, the hot Aussie girl who's married to Orlando Bloom? The soppy one with the long blonde hair from Lord of the Rings? Remember?) is back from maternity leave and the world is a better place for it. After popping up in a few fashion shows, award ceremonies and various other important looking dos, she’s back to doing what she does best, which involves wearing Victoria’s Secret's latest ranges of lingerie and swimwear and having her picture taken a lot. She’s really rather good at it, to be fair.

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REALLY rather REALLY good

Yep, you read correctly, these shots are the very first after the birth of her first child and onehelluvamouthful: Flynn Christopher Blanchard Copeland Bloom, who Miranda took a few weeks away from to shoot her latest set for the lingerie giants, meaning Orlando was left alone with his young son.

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"Well I wasn't gonna call him 'Wan'"

We dread to think what he was teaching his first-born in Miranda’s absence, seeing as Flynn Christopher Blanchard Copeland Bloom is at such an impressionable age. Maybe he was teaching him how to fire a bow and arrow, like he did in Lord of the Rings, as Legolas. Perhaps he was giving him lessons in dueling with swords, which he picked up on set on of Pirates of the Caribbean. He could have been teaching him the basics of boxing from the time he starred in The Calcium Kid. Or maybe, just maybe, he was teaching him how to act.

God forbid.