Look, it’s Olivia Wilde. She’s an actress. She’s 26. She is a distant relation of the novelist Evelyn Waugh who wrote a satirical book called Scoop about journalism and the like. It’s really great. Funny. Smart. Ridiculous.

Right now (as in: in this article) Olivia Wilde is in the magazine Vanity Fair looking all beautiful. She’s very much a ‘natural’ beauty, is Wilde. What with her very pretty face and very slim figure and all that. She’s going to be in the film Tron: Legacy which is coming out on December 17 and is about a man going inside a computer game to try and find his Dad. Of course it is. Who hasn’t done that? That was always our excuse.

FHM’s Mum: “FHM, why don’t you stop playing that bloody computer game and come downstairs and eat your chips you fat useless bastard.”

FHM: “Sorry Mum, looking for Dad.”

Olivia Wilde is also in House and House is great. If you didn’t know anything about Sherlock Holmes as per the books written by Arthur Conan Doyle, Dr Gregory House is the kind of programme that makes characters like Sherlock in the BBC’s recent reimagining of the detective look rubbish. But if you’re well versed in Sherlock you’ll know that, really, Dr Gregory House is very much influenced by the detective that Doyle created in that he’s a cranky, mentally disturbed, slightly autistic genius. Dr House is a doctor, natch. But both House and Holmes make a living from working stuff out, and that’s cool.

HEAD TO VANITY FAIR FOR MORE