Get. This. Pamela Anderson, Kelly Osbourne and Eva Mendes are all on board with the very modern indeed idea that hurting animals is bad.

You’ve gotta say, it’s a solid idea, and one we’ve had inside our brains from a very young age because we’re NOT PSYCHOPATHS. But it’s nice to remind all the people out there who dig hurting animals that they’re going to go to hell. We went to school with this dude who used to go out in has car with his mate, kidnap a cat, put it in the boot, drive to a quiet spot, pick the cat out of the boot by its hind legs and wrap it round a lamppost like a towel. He was an arsehole, and he’s definitely going to hell. In hell, all the animals are massive and will peck out your eyeballs to get their revenge. In hell, all the animals breathe fire and will flame his limbs because he’s a bad person.

Here's a picture we made:

Pamela Anderson is American and quite old these days, but we love her like we love marijuana because she was something of a gateway to the harder stuff when we were 15. Pamela -> Lindsay Dawn Mckenzie -> Jo Guest -> Jenna Jameson -> Sasha Grey = marijuana -> snorting port -> mainlining coffee -> pints of whiskey -> petrol baths.

Kelly Osbourne is English and speaks like she lives in Buckingham Palace, and yet when she says the word ‘anti’ she pronounces it ‘an-tie’ like an American. This reminds us of the time our sister went to Brazil for three months and came back with a South African accent. It made no sense. South American, maybe. But South African? Luckily, it faded. We hugged her and forgot all about it.

Eva Mendes has amazing hair.


1/ Sasha Grey naked for a PETA ad
2/ Christian Serratos naked for PETA
3/ Keeley Hazell naked for PETA


1/ Rachel Bilson went to Paris Fashion Week
2/ Naomi Campbell naked in Russia
3/ Kelly Brook and Vanessa Hudgens, together at last