Nadine Coyle was always the one from Girls Aloud who had the second highest sexy potential behind that Cheryl Cole. Sarah Harding just looked way too capable of kicking you in the nuts and Kimberley Walsh, despite having arguably the best bum of the five-piece, just had a bit of a scary face. So it’s a shame that Nadine’s fledgling solo career has made headlines this week for exactly the wrong reason. It was reported yesterday that only 117 people had bought debut single, Insatiable. 117. That’s ten football teams and a subs bench. Not good.

That’s compared with her not-so-bessy-mate Cheryl Cole, who shipped 157,000 copies of new song Promise This (which has a PROPERLY STUPID chorus – Ed.) on the back of her performance on X Factor, the very same show that Nadine said she wouldn’t perform on because it wouldn’t do her vocals justice. Ouch. Also, Nadine, we don’t want to rub it in but choosing Tesco to exclusively release your record isn’t very glam. It might push loads of teenage girls and their daughters through the checkouts, but their microwavable Chicken Korma needs to go back to the drawing board because we had one last night and it tastes like feet.

Nadine Coyle looking hot and singing

And what’s going on here? Looks like something out of Happy Gilmore. Also: terrifying. You were lucky to get 117. But send us a copy and we promise to put it on the office stereo. Not in. On. Tops. Oh Nadine, you have such great legs.

 Nadine Coyle singing her debut single