Did you watch the MTV EMAs last night? We skipped across to Belfast with awards sponsors Hyundai to investigate the beautiful women at the event, because we take our jobs very seriously.
Don't look now, but the Selena's irises are taking over her eyes
Selena Gomez, who we like because she definitely doesn't take herself too seriously (we hate it when people do that) was there, obvo, because she was presenting the awards over in Belfast. Is she really that big in Ireland? Couldn't they get Michael Flatley or someone?
In the entrance hall, the organisers had placed a giant MTV award (presumably for Godzilla if he shows up and demands to be included) which some celebrities posed nearby and pretended that they were tiny pixies, a bit like when you hold a giant can of beans at the supermarket. Celebrities like Irina Shayk! Cracking. Imagine if she was that small. She'd end up caught in mousetraps and all sorts.
Ashley wore her triforce knuckledusters just in case shit kicked off
We didn't know who Ashley Rickards was but we did a bit of research and found out that she's in hip new MTV comedy-drama Awkward, in which she doesn't look this good but still looks pretty good anyway if you get us. We might watch it as long as no-one catches us watching MTV, you know?
Mysterious shoe longed for a life in the spotlight
Hayden Panettiere is tiny. In other news, she was joined on stage by an actual fully naked dude (unnamed, not pictured) who seemed to be part of proceedings, with his wang flopping about and everything. We can see why you'd be keen to impress her, dude, but you're going about it entirely the wrong way.
Plastic cups! Classy
Finally, Bar Rafaeli. Nuff said.
Thanks to Hyundai for looking after us all weekend. For more information on the new Hyundai Veloster head over here.