Victoria’s Secret has made an incredible bra. Done it. Obliterated it it. Eaten it. Destroyed it. Made ‘light work of it’. Bras. On mammary glands. On women. On the earth. During a day. Before a night. Under a sky. Above the ground. Within the atmosphere. Under the glaring eyes of the Lord God Jesus Christ. Above the smouldering horns of Satan. Within the gentle clasp of Mother Nature. You can have a look at it in the video above. What do you think? “Incredible”? Answers below. Nothing too long please, we’re helluva lazy when it comes to reading. All those letters in all those words in all those books, magazines, pamphlets, websites, ingredient lists on bottles of shampoo.
Victoria’s Secret does this a lot of course. Loves. Likes it. Can’t get enough of it. Just ask Candice Swanepoel. Just ask Miranda Kerr. Just ask Tyra Banks. Just ask Karen Mulder. Just ask Daniela Pestova. Just ask Stephanie Seymour. Just ask Ines Rivero. Just ask Laetitia Casta. Just as Heidi Klum. Just ask Gisele Bundchen. Just ask Adriana Lima. Just ask Alessandra Ambrosio. Just ask Karolina Kurkova. Just ask Selita Ebanks. Just ask Izabel Goulart. Just ask Marisa Miller. Just ask Doutzoen Kroes.
Did you ask them? They said “yes”, didn’t they? Thought so. Heroic individuals. Tremendous persons. Unbelievable creatures. Fabulous ladies. Full of truth and glory and joy, honesty and purity and energy. Beacons of hope. Deliverers of promises. Executioners of ideas. Keepers of secrets. Victoria’s Secrets.
No idea where that came from. We can only apologise.