Just so you remember: Australian model Miranda Kerr is married to Orlando Bloom and is currently pregnant. Just so you remember: Victoria’s Secret model Miranda Kerr makes a living out of modelling swimsuits so it’s okay to take a sneaky peak even though she’s someone else’s wife. We wouldn’t recommend it in real life though. That shit will get heavy. So anyway: Miranda’s pregnant. Which could go some way to explaining why her bosoms are looking larger than they normally do. That baby’s going to need to eat, and Miranda’s going to be the one to feed it. Milk: it’s a winner. Full of calcium and other goodness. Nice with cereal, disastrous in an omelette. For many years FHM thought the correct way to make an omelette was to add milk at the ‘whisking the eggs’ stage. The moment we found out we were wrong was revelatory. Gone were the days of having to cook the bugger for half an hour just to get the weird wet bits to go away. Gone were the days of our eggy gloop falling apart into a globby mess as soon as we tried to slide it onto the plate. Now it just turns into scrambled egg and we have no idea why, but at least it’s not messy. For the record, our favourite ingredients include: cheese, mushrooms. Bacon’s okay but it gets fiddly and can be all salty. Herbs usually work out well, especially parsley with mushrooms. We saw Raymond Blanc make a smoked salmon omelette on the TV once which looked amazing but we’ve never made one because we don’t eat smoked salmon because we’re not a posh mum and we don’t have any lemons.

MIRANDA:

MORE GIRL STORIES ON FHM.COM:

1/ Natalia Paris teddy bear sex tape
2/ Lady Gaga wore a meat dress at the MTV Awards
3/ Scarlett Johansson in new Mango adverts

MORE MIRANDA KERR ON FHM.COM:

1/ Miranda Kerr totally naked... under her bikini
2/ Watch Miranda Kerr trying on bikinis
3/ Miranda Kerr in sexy lingerie. Again

GALLERY: