10 good things that aren’t as good as Mila Kunis
Wearing a suit
(This only really applies if you don’t wear a suit every day.)
At first it feels great. Admiring glances as, for the first time. female peers look at you in a different light and consider what it would be like to walk down the aisle to stand by your side. (They’ve decided it would be a life of misery, but at least they considered it.) The immediate respect it gets you. You’re not a kid anymore. The ‘Yeah, I’m wearing a suit – what of it?’ walk you adopt. Your posture improved. “No, no Ribena for me today, mum. I’ll have a glass of wine with tea. I mean dinner, of course.”
And then you realise that you’ve spilt a bit of Bolognese on your lapel. And the shirt you’ve had since Year 11 that you swore still fitted is actually a bit tight and displaying quite a large ‘moob-hole’ to anyone viewing you in profile. And then, within seconds of hitting the dance floor, you’ve split your trousers. Not just a bit. A full front-to-back, there’s no way back from here job.
You don’t get that problem with Mila Kunis.
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