Lindsay Lohan’s done a dating video for Funny Or Die in which she looks healthy, has amazing hair and amusingly takes the piss out of the cruel and vicious world that consumes her. It’s also making us have an existential semi-crisis about how excited we are that an oik like Lindsay has been involved in something that doesn’t make her look like a total dick. And that excitement is translating into fear and paranoia that it’s us, and not ‘them’, that are wrong about everything and perhaps we do give celebrities a hard time and maybe they should be given a break and allowed to get on with whatever they're good at. But if we gave them a break, we’d have nothing to write about and they’d have nothing to appear in, or on, and we’d all just collapse and die in a vacuous panic. And we can't give them a break just because one of them did something that wasn't mind-bendingly self-absorbed. And why do we keep calling them 'them'? Oh God.