B Brigstock, via e-mail...

“Aged 19, I once went on a date with a girl. Cinema, smuggled bottle of wine, McDonald’s… I knew how to treat her. Until it came to talking about our families. Turns out our fathers knew each other: her’s was a prison officer and my dad was, well… an ‘old lag’ serving time for burglary. With ‘sins of the father’ in mind, she promptly dumped me.”