“During university summer holidays, I found myself working as a 'chef' at Pizzaland (a tacky northern rip off of Pizza Hut). Where ,one day, I accidentally put meat on a vegetarian pizza.

The customer was highly allergic, had a reaction and got taken off in an ambulance. She was in hospital for four days, and then sued for £1,800. I made it into the Sun, the Mirror and the Daily Mail. And then afterwards, the dole queue.”


Mal A, via email