Things You'll Never Get Back After Your Breakup (Including Your Favorite Hoodie)

It's no secret that the time after a breakup can be especially hard for people. Some guys lash out by drinking and avoiding responsibility, others throw themselves into their work with reckless abandon, and some swear off romance altogether. No matter what your coping mechanism might be, the one thing that unifies us all is the sh-t your ex-girlfriend is never giving you back. We know, we know, it seems trivial, but, hey! Some of that stuff is pretty darn sentimental and it can be an even worser blow than losing, say, your faith in love.

As you saw in the video below, most of these items are tangible. Call us materialistic if you'd like, we're OK with that. What we're not OK with is every freakin' girlfriend we've ever had commandeering our favorite hoodies like they're a F'in pirate ship. We get it, they're more comfortable, but guess what? That's why we love them!

Your Favorite Hoodie

Since we're already on the subject, let's just keep it rolling. Ladies, WTF gives? Why do you even want to keep a raggedy old sweatshirt that reminds you off your ex? It's simply cruel. Unless you own literally no other clothing, please return our favorite hoodie(s). It's a small kindness that will cost you zero dollars, please and thank you.

Your "Special" Playlist

It's safe to say that most couples have a playlist that they like to get "down and dirty to". While that's all well and good during the relationship, it's pretty F'in bad afterward. All of a sudden you'll be driving and a song will come on the radio that completely destroys your mood. Yeah, all those songs you guys loved so much? You'll never get those back.

All The Money You Spent On Her

We know the emotional toll of the relationship ending is far worse than the financial toll, but it still grinds our gears. Think about all those Chipotle trips where she didn't care that guac was extra. Man, you're never seeing that money again.

Your Shared Netflix Account

By "shared" Netflix account, we mean her Netflix account that she lets you bum off her. You better believe she's going to change that password the moment y'all breakup. You'd think you could coparent the account in peace, but, nope! Most women aren't capable of that level of compassion.

Your Coupled-Up Friends

This one is actually sort of a good thing. It can be pretty annoying to hang out with all couples, all the time. After a breakup, it's safe to say your coupled-up friends are going to choose sides. Generally speaking, they'll take your ex-girlfriends side and you'll be in the clear. Gone are the days where every conversation is monopolized by a bunch of people calling each other, "babe".

That about sums it up, guys! There's most likely 100 more emotional losses we could list, but, nah, we'd rather not cross that bridge. It's not like we wouldn't be able to handle it or anything, it's just, you know, us men have to try and play it cool (as we softly weep on the inside).

Lead Image via Getty

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