In The Land of Dating, nothing is ever certain. I'm a firm believer that the success of two people romantically relies on one major factor—chemistry. The fact that this chemistry can't be taught, let alone faked, is what creates a very dismal reality for those just dipping a toe in the dating pool. You either have it or you don't, right? Well, yes, technically. However, placing emphasis on other distractions, like sex for example, might be worsening things altogether. How are you going to determine if there's chemistry on a deeper level if you're just focusing on the surface level?
MORE: 'What Are The Best Online Dating Openers To Guarantee That You Score?'
This "spark" everyone is always talking about is commonly confused for lust and in short, it's aligning modern dating with an unsavory hookup culture. This isn't just my opinion either, turns out, good conversation while a completely lost art is EXACTLY what 2017 singles are looking for.
MORE: 'The Five Biggest Mistakes A Dating Expert Said Single People Keep Making'
In a study conducted by the popular online dating service, Plenty Of Fish called Conversation Starter they pooled 2,005 respondents that revealed not only the importance of conversation, but the proof that conversation is MORE important than sex.
MORE: '8 Fail-Proof Ways To Improve Your Online Dating Luck'
The study was incredibly diverse which is always, always, always the goal for yielding accurate results. The demographics I believe to be most important are as followed—
Total respondents: 2,005
Location: The United States
Ages: 18-70+ years
Men: 881(43.9%) Women: 1124 (56.1%)
Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual/Straight: (87.1%), Gay/Lesbian/Homosexual: (7.4%), Bisexual: (4.2%), Other: (1.3%)
See? That's a huge demo, especially when it comes to age and sexual orientation. Yes, I realize that the heterosexual group was the largest by well over half, but to even include other sexual orientations is a lot more inclusive than can be said for other modern dating studies. The results were pretty unanimous when it came to a couple of subjects—
90% of singles would rather talk all night on a first date than have sex all night.
87% of singles have someone more attractive after a conversation based on intelligence (42%), sexy voice (40%), and sense of humor (34%).
On the contrary, conversation is a quick way to determine if you AREN'T attracted to someone, which hey! Is also pretty important: having nothing in common (61%), coming across insensitive or mean (58%), misaligned values (57%)
I do realize it's 2017 and that while the written word is still super-duper important, ya'll prefer your statistics with a spoonful of sugar (i.e. pictures). These infographics reinforce the study in an easy to digest way—
MORE: 'Diving Back Into The Dating Pool? Here's A Everything You Need To Know About First Date Expectations'