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We're here today to talk about the ins and outs of getting back with an ex. You might be wondering why we feel compelled to cover such a dumpster-fire-headache-fueling topic, but we've got our reasons. Let's just say we had a little Hollywood inspiration or, #WoodSpo, if you prefer (we just made that up, so, make it happen). Now that we've explained ourselves, let's kick this thing off. If at any point you need to excuse yourself to cry, feel free. We all have terrible exes that we regularly wish would contract genital herpes. Here we go...
Romeo and Juliet, Anthony and Cleopatra, Hamlet and Ophelia — these are just a few examples of Shakespearean romances that don't hold a damn candle to the hellscape that is the Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez love story. Seriously, these two just can't seem to quit one another and while Nicholas Sparks has no problem turning that sort of toxic dependency into best-sellers, we're just over it.
To sit here and talk about Selena and Justin specifically would be a waste of our valuable time. Instead, we're going to use their relationship as an archetype for that annoying "on-again, off-again" couple everyone hates. See? Who says Hollywood gossip can't be useful. Suck on that, every writing professor we've ever had.
In all seriousness, getting back with an ex can be a very complex, unnerving decision. Fact is, not all relationships are cut from the same cloth and what works for one person, might not work for another. It's about tapping deep within yourself to decide what YOU want and if that person (your ex) makes the cut. It's not selfish, it's survival — remember that. In the spirit of making your decision a wee-bit easier, we decided to list some universal pros and cons below.
You already know what their breath smells like in the morning.
If they have a dog, you can finally reunite.
You've already met their friends/family.
You're (ideally) physically attracted to them.
You have inside jokes.
You don't need to have the awkward "first talks" about sex, money or politics.
It's all you've ever known and humans love habit.
You've already sh*t-talked them to all your friends/family/coworkers/doctors/lawyers/anyone who will listen
You're likely to be reminded of why you broke up in the first place (constantly).
You have to go back to buying food for two.
Trust issues are inevitable.
We're not sure if that was entirely helpful, but, hey! We tried. Let the last pro/con be a reminder that while habit is comforting, it can be suffocating. Don't stay with someone, or even worse, go back to someone because you don't think you can hack it on your own. That would be a real tragedy, no? As for Selena and Justin, y'all on your own.
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