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Gather around, guys! Today we're going to teach you how NOT to be creepy, because let's face it, this epidemic is getting a wee-bit out of hand. We understand that approaching women can be difficult, but that doesn't really give you carte blanche to be a total nightmare — seriously, you might not be a character from a horror movie, but that's exactly what women see after your refusal to take a hint. You are Michael Myers...and we're not talking the dude who played Austin Powers.
That's why when we came across this Askreddit thread, we thought it would be a swell idea to school our readers on what NOT to do. Sometimes the best way to learn something is by indulging in other people's epic failures. Reddit user, OnlyGenuineQuestions posed the following, well, very genuine question:
"Women, what are common ways unfamiliar men make you uncomfortable or creeped out?"
Listen, learn, DO BETTER. Women have to deal with enough crap without having your creepy ass make them 10 different kinds of uncomfortable in a matter of minutes. Women were not put on this earth to stroke your ego, if she's not interested — keep it moving, Tiger.
Leave The Waitress Alone, Weirdo
"Hitting on you at work, especially in a service industry role. I can't get away from you, part of my job is to be nice and polite to you, I can't get tell you to f*ck off or I might get fired. I hated it when guys did this when I was a waitress or barmaid."
Whispering Is Definitely A No-Go
"Yesterday I was walking out of my office building when a stranger passed me and WHISPERED 'Smiiiiiile'."
Shove Those Fingers Up Your...
"I've had someone click their fingers inches from my face and then signal that I take my earphones out. I thought they might have some important information for me and was willing to forgive the rudeness, but nope, they wanted to chat."
What Are You, The Paparazzi?
"Guys trying to take sneaky pictures. I didn't notice it initially, but then one time his phone wasn't on silent. Makes me not want to go out on public."
Take A Hint, Pal
"When a guy stands near me and just smiles at me for several minutes... non-stop... without saying anything."
Personal Space, Please
"If we're the only two people at the bus stop, there is no reason that you would need to stand directly next to me."
"Don't follow a woman around Walmart taking pictures of her butt. I just wanted a bag of medium grain rice."
No, It Doesn't
"When they yell or whistle at you from a car. I’m someone who loves to walk and can’t seem to do so without getting treated like a piece of meat. Like seriously does that actually work on girls?"
Age Isn't Just A Number
"Older guys who clearly don't care about an age gap. From the ages of 11-13 are when I got catcalled and harassed the most and I think that's gross. I wasn't tall, older-looking or 'developed' or anything, they were just creeps."
Where's My Hug?
"If I don't know you well and you start trying that whole teasing/cheeky banter type of thing with me (e.g. 'Oh, so am I not getting a hug then?' followed by exaggerated pouting, that kind of thing). It isn't endearing, it's obnoxious and it makes me feel uncomfortable and put on the spot, please stop it."
Sweet, Sweet Poetry
"When in doubt: Never say anything to a woman that you would not want to hear from a man... in prison."
To read the full thread, head on over to Reddit for more tips on how NOT to approach women, ya creeps!
Lead Image via Getty