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There are a lot of ideas, theories and suggestions for how to be happy — hell, we've even given you the price people would pay for it! Still, happiness is measured differently by pretty much everyone, with some valuing financial success as the be-all and end-all. Some think happiness it's good health for themselves, family and friends. And others just want the everyday anxiety or stress that comes with work, family/friends, finances and other things to be as minimal as possible.
Well, however you measure happiness, there are a few things that men can do to influence the outcome of their own lives. That's why we talked to Dr. Alok Trivedi, a psychological performance coach and author of the new book Chasing Success, who gave us six things that men should stop doing to find the keys to happiness.
Remember, guys, you're, ultimately, the only person who can choose how to be happy, so focusing on eliminating these things from your life will go a long way in making that happen.
Forget what your parents want you to do. Don’t think about what direction your teachers pointed you in. Don’t worry about other people’s version of the America dream. Where do you want to go? What do you want to be doing? What will make you happy? Focus on this because until you honor yourself first, you can’t make an impact on the rest of the world.
It’s easy to look around at your friends, neighbors and other people your age. Don’t! That only makes you focus on what they are doing instead of what you need to be doing. This is a losing proposition because there will always be someone who is smarter, stronger, prettier or more advanced in his career. The only person you need to be concerned with is you.
Stop telling yourself that ‘things will be better when’ you make more money, get the promotion, have a bigger house, have nicer clothes or anything else. It’s a fantasy rooted in psychological delusion and simply an excuse to not deal with your present situation. These things might bring forms of happiness, but they don’t solve your problems or change who you are.
Often times, the only person holding you back from happiness is you. It sounds backwards but it’s true. If you’re easily held back by negative thoughts like, “I’m not good enough to get it,” and “I don’t deserve it,” then it’s never going to happen. The first rule to getting what you want out of life is to believe in yourself.
What happened to your big dreams and enthusiasm you used to have for life? Are you constantly flying below the radar, afraid to take chances and always playing it safe? Remember that like attracts like so your fears are attracting even more fear and scarcity. It’s a never-ending pattern of behavior that will force you to miss opportunities and always hold you back from getting what you want out of life.
One of the best ways to be happy: show gratitude. When you live in a state of gratefulness you are going to be happier. Gratitude brings better sleep, more self-esteem and confidence, makes us feel relaxed, intensifies our relationships, keeps us healthier, strengthens our emotional responses and helps attract people our way. All of this leads to more happiness.
Get more info from Dr. Alok Trivedi by reading his new book, Chasing Success, as well as visiting his website.
Lead image via Getty.
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