Dating apps, especially Tinder, are absolute crapshoots, guys. We may all think that it's easier to meet women on one, but, realistically, most of the options are either looking for immediate marriage or a quick one-and-done hookup. One of the things that makes Tinder so tricky is the whole messaging side of things—you know, because as the guy, you're typically the one looked at to break the ice.
Problem is, you've got to come with your A game, otherwise you could be left out in the cold. Come on too strong though, and you may end up getting blocked or deleted! There's a lot of finesse and etiquette involved, gentleman. It's sort of like cooking rice, there's no happy medium if you make even the slightest mistake—and let's be real, undercooked and overcooked rice are both equally as awful.
Thanks to Elite Daily, though—who asked real women on the app their thoughts on icebreakers and such—we have an idea of what works and what doesn't, so pay attention.
Focus On Photo Quality
"If men aren’t smiling in their pictures, it means they either have really bad teeth or they have zero sense of humor. If they use screenshots of their snapchats, unless it is extremely hilarious, I don’t want to see it until we are Snapchat friends."
"If I see the same girl in every picture, I’m going to assume she is your recent ex-girlfriend, and you don’t have any good pictures of yourself since you guys broke up."
"Also, if you’re showing off the Grouper you just caught on your dad’s fishing boat… boy, bye." — Ricki, 27
No Mirror Selfies
"A mirror selfie comes off very conceited. He really can’t find one candid picture of himself that does his looks justice? It also comes off like he is way too concerned with looking perfect." — Mariah, 27
Your Height Is, Uh, Lackluster
"If someone has five pictures on their profile, and all of them are group photos, most of us will assume you’re the shortest, most unattractive one in the photo and/or don’t have time to play detective and match your face in each photo. Also, to whoever was the first girl to have balls and flat-out ask her online match how tall they were, thank you. “5’8″ if you care” is an appreciated note, and if you fall under 5’9″, I’m swiping left." — Maddie, 27
"If you’re not smiling in any of your photos, that’s a turnoff. Why so serious? And if you’re partying or wasted in every photo, that’s too intense for the opposite reason. No matter how nice your muscles are or your expensive watch may be, those photos just make you seem superficial — even if you’re not. And if I have to channel Sherlock Holmes to figure out which person in the group you are, that’s too much work right off the bat." — Janet, 24