So what’s going on this weekend? Hitting the town hard? Meeting some ladies? Having a gentle walk in  the park? Good luck. If you manage to avoid getting stabbed before you’ve even reached the end of your street, there’s all sorts of other hazards lurking in that terrifying urban jungle. So stay in. Get one of those massive bottles of Strongbow, a big bag of crisps and maybe even a girlfriend. And then watch two of these three:

The Big One: Anvil! The Story of Anvil

Stars: Tiziana Arrigoni, Glenn Gyorffy, Kevin Goocher

The film: A documentary about a Canadian metal band who, despite never making it big, have been named as influences by the likes of metal gods Metallica and Slayer. Now middle aged, the film follows the production of their 13th album, and last ditch effort for notoriety.

Extras: Grab the two-disc edition – it includes a copy of This is Thirteen, the album featured in the film.

The Weird One: The Class

Stars: François Bégaudeau

The film: It’s a French drama about a teacher struggling to control the pupils of an unruly Parisian school. Sounds rubbish, but made a massive impact at Cannes and nearly bagged an Oscar, so well worth a look.

Extras: Interviews, making-of documentary, commentary and rehearsal footage.

The Shit One: Goal 3

Stars: Kuno Becker, JJ Field, Nick Moran

The film: Set during the 2006 World Cup, the film follows Mexico’s Santiago Munez on a quest to bag football’s ultimate prize. And he does, which is just one of many things that make sure this is utter cack.

Extras: Cast interviews. And nothing else.