Esmee Denters, Arctic Monkeys, Bashy, Cargo Cult and Bastila have put time aside this week to show you a good time. That’s right. In return, turn your lights off, close your eyes, get naked (optional) and listen to these five tunes with the volume up and your minds open so wide you'd only half fill them if all the legal drugs in Mexico were poured in.

1/ The biggie: Esmée Denters – Outta Here

Dutch singer Esmée Denters was plucked from YouTube obscurity by Justin Timberlake who watched her singing Mariah Carey and Beyonce covers and immediately signed her to his Tennman label. She’s going to bust the charts wide open with this tune (you just watch), and then everyone will accuse of her shagging Timberlake. But not us. We’re better than that, and so is she.

2/ The indie biggie: Arctic Monkeys – Crying Lightning

We don’t care what anyone says, the new Arctic Monkeys album is pumping, this video is weird and eerie (in a good way) and we’re delighted that a big British indie band has finally had the balls to experiment. And that Turner chump gets to hump Alexa Chung even though his hair makes him look like a 12-year-old boy. He so deserves it.

3/ The futuristic maniac: Bashy – Your Wish Is My Command

Great work Bashy, you kind of camp street-talking intergalactic space cowboy you, for making pop music that’s way-ahead-of-its-time and stuck in the past all at the same time. H-Boogie’s guest vocal is saucy, repeating “I’m really trying not to be bad” before heading into a black hole of futuristic sex with the song’s hero (in the video, not in real life - it’s not a documentary).

4/ The dance floor banger: Cargo Cult – Gyratory System

We love music videos that make us want to puke and we love songs that make us wonder what, if we all lived on Mars, the DJs would be like. It’s going to happen. Cargo Cult know exactly what’s going down, and they’re getting us ready one industrial clunk, dance floor rattle and kaleidoscopic mirror-mind-bend promo at a time.

5/ The winner of this weeks Singles Club lucky dip: Bastila – Ghosts

This is kind of lovely, but also a bit lame. It’s the kind of music we might listen to if we’d just broken up with someone. However, we’d soon realise it was only making us sadder, and decide to embark on an Iron Maiden marathon accompanied by four pints of whiskey instead. Yeah, and we’re so frickin’ tough we’d need another four pints before we even felt anything.