Pixie Lott, Muse, The Big Pink, Bananarama and Invasion were the top acts invited to Singles Club this week, and they’ve all showed up. It’s a big moment. And as everyone who’s been here before knows, getting invited in the first place is nice. But getting two invites is the equivalent of ordering a meal in a restaurant and being given another just because you look nice. That’s how The Big Pink feel right now, as new single Dominos follows Stop The World in receiving FHM’s love. Champagne opened, bottle guzzled, havoc wreaked. ROCK. HUGS. BED.

1/ The token hot girl to make people read the article: Pixie LottBoys and Girls

2009’s pop star extraordinaire continues her rise to the top of mountain pop with a song about boys, girls and stuff like that. It’s alright, and Pixie looks bloody brilliant in the video, especially when she’s sitting in that teacup like a sexy little teabag. You might say she looks almost as good as she did on the cover of the October issue of FHM. We look after our own, we do.

2/ The band who might be losing it: MuseUprising

Argh, there is NO VIDEO on YouTube for this and it makes us angry. We don’t care whose fault it is, but it makes us like the song less. Yeah, we’ve said it. We’re unable and unwilling to separate how annoying searching hopelessly for the goddamn visual accompaniment to Uprising is, from any insightful clinical analysis we might do of Muse’s take on the Doctor Who theme. Sorry.

3/ The band who might be winning it: The Big PinkDominos

And now ladies and gentleman, a bit of history. The Big Pink are the first band to make a second appearance in FHM’s Singles Club and bloody hell they deserve it. Dominos is a banger, following on from all the other great songs they’ve released. If they don’t become enormous at some point in their career, we can officially disregard the music industry as ‘pointless’.

4/ The comeback: Bananarama - Love Comes

Before the Sugababes, Girls Aloud, the Spice Girls, the Saturdays, the Dolly Rockers and other girl bands, there was Bananarama. And now Bananarama are back to be amazing all over again, with the distinctly modern sounding Love Comes. Modern apart from the ‘80s synths that dominate the track that is. Also impressive is how well Keren Woodward and Sara Dallin have taken care of themselves. They look very healthy.

5/ Some satanic psych-metal: InvasionConjure War

There's no one in the universe who doesn’t need more psych-metal in their lives, and Invasion are a great way to start. There are solid levels of Satanism in the video, some above average female shrieking and it all conspires to create a great song if you enjoy far-out sounds with an undercurrent of evil. If you don’t, you should.