1/ Glastonbury 2009

When?
On both BBC’s, last weekend, slotted in around Wimbledon coverage.

Why should I watch it?
The BBC had 407 journalists at Glastonbury this year, 12 less than they had at the Beijing Olympics last summer. That. Is. Insane. And makes it even more annoying that all you get on TV is Jo Whiley wearing some kind of fucking-hell-it's-Glasto-I-better-dress-like-a-twat hippy outfit and going on about how Blur are “amazing”, and how Neil Young was “amazing” and how Bruce Springsteen was “amazing”. And even though they were, you expect something more from someone who’s supposed to know more about music than everyone else. Zane Lowe was good though, with his funny introductions and over enthusiasm that borders on psychosis. It’s infectious. Like psychosis.

But really, Glasto ain’t about the TV presenters. It’s about the hits, the bangers, the sunshine, the drugs, the sorrow, the joy, the madness, the hippies, the heroes, the oversized Yorkshire puddings, the mud, the theft, the hairy armpits and the fish that die from all the piss that dribbles into the river from the top of the stone circle. Ah, good times. And Whiley was right. All the headliners did look awesome, even if The Boss pretended to be Jesus for two and a half hours. So all that really remains is for you to choose which gig you want to watch.

Where:
Click the artist for the gig. The Boss. Blur. Neil Young. The Prodigy and Black Eyed Peas. Lily Allen and Lady Gaga. There's more, obviously, but you'll work it out.

2/ Wimbledon

When?
On both BBC’s, constantly, until after next Sunday’s final.

Why should I watch it?
It’s probably not the weird pressure put on British tennis players at Wimbledon that unsettles them, but the novelty of people caring at all. For two weeks a year England goes mental for tennis. For the other 50, no one gives a damn, and Andy Murray and co go about their business without anyone noticing. So you can forgive them for getting annoyed at the sudden influx of media intrusion for two weeks in June. But not even Andy 'supposedly moody' Murray gets annoyed anymore because he can’t be arsed and he’s too busy being really good at tennis. Which is all quite boring. It’s like watching Tim Henman all over again, with one small difference: Murray might win the bloody thing. And it’ll be a victory that, even though he’s Scottish, we can all claim. Because we deserve to feel warm inside every now and then for something we’ve had very little to do with.

Where:
Go to BBC iPlayer's special Wimbledon page.

3/ That Mitchell & Webb Look

When?
Thursday 9.30pm, BBC 2

Why should I watch it?
Watching That Mitchell & Webb Look can be tricky because it’s never going to be as good as Peep Show. But that doesn’t really matter because it’s not trying to be Peep Show, so you’re just going to have to get those thoughts out of your damn mind. Except you can't. And neither can we. And it’s even trickier when they’re not in costume because Mark and Jez are such potent comedy characters. Nonetheless, That Mitchell & Webb Look is in its third series, and is totally acceptable sketch comedy. This week’s highlights include a Bond parody based around fairground games, a lairy best man speech. a sitcom starring the Queen (who’s shit), and a philanthropic superhero who loves donkeys and has an ejaculating cock on his costume.

Where:
Watch it on BBC iPlayer.