On first dates
We may look confident, but it’s a front. We’re horrendously insecure, so you need to take control. Be cool, laid-back, make us feel at ease.
Women like to be protected.
I don’t mean fight anyone who looks at us – that’s not attractive. I mean make us feel like you could knock someone out should the need occur.
Hairy men have got to think about waxing.
Women keep their body hair under control. You should too. It’s going to be more pleasant for both of us.
I can get ready in ten minutes.
You should be able to, too. There’s nothing worse than a man who takes too much time pampering. Peacocks have had their time.
Flowers aren’t naff.
They’re a true old-fashioned romantic gesture.
It’s not that we’re never wrong.
It’s that you don’t get what we’re telling you.