Dear Angels, I’m 32 and a bunch of my friends have recently started dating much younger, quite fit girls – like 19-22 year olds. Unsurprisingly, the men are loving it, but what the hell’s in it for the women? Are they just using them for their cash, or is their some hidden attraction that I’m missing?
Tom H, via e-mail
Angel Anna: We’re biologically programmed to be more mature so that by the time our menfolk have grown some actual testicles, our baby-making gear hasn’t seized up. Dubious theory aside, these girls are probably just bored of watching guys of their own age getting drunk on cheap lager. Make the most of it.
Angel Jen: These sort of shenanigans aren’t too bad. A 19-year-old girl could find a 32-year-old man attractive for reasons other than money. Plus, they’ve been legal for three years. I say go for it.
Dear Angels, my girlfriend’s parents are coming for a weekend in London to celebrate their anniversary, and we’ve got to take them somewhere fancy for dinner. Only problem is, I don’t have a clue where to go. I don’t mind shelling out a bit, but I want it to be somewhere that’s actually worth it, rather than somewhere that’s just a rip off. They’re both big fans of meat and seafood, but beyond that they’re pretty easy to please. Where the hell should I take them? And where to avoid?
Angel Eleanor: London restaurants fall into three groups: cheap and tasty, pricey and disappointing or extortionate but worth it. I would go for the latter. I’m guessing they’re not native Londoners so I’d suggest going somewhere iconic. It’s virtually impossible to get a weekend table at most of Gordon Ramsay’s restaurants or the Ivy without a good two months’ notice, so avoid organising this at the last minute. And if you and your party wish to maintain some faith in the human race I would avoid ending up near Leicester Square on a Saturday evening.
Angel Anna: Eating out in London is a different kettle of locally sourced line-caught sea bass these days. You no longer have to endure suffocating stuffiness and nosebleed-inducing prices for a top-notch meal and it’s far more impressive if you don’t just chuck another wad Ramsay’s way. For really top-end Italian, River Café and Zafferano are world-beating; for perfectly-poised service and classic French cooking, Le Gavroche is the daddy; for innovative tapas-style French, head to Club Gascon or its little brother Le Cercle; Soho’s Quo Vadis serves up British crowd-pleasers in a gorgeous room. If they’re open-minded, St John is every critic’s favourite, and the seafood at Scott’s is loved by celebrities. Check out squaremeal.co.uk if you’re stuck.
Dear Angels, I got told that I had herpes two years ago, but I haven’t had any symptoms or an outbreak since. Am I in the clear? I need to know as my current girlfriend is talking about us stopping using condoms (she’s on the pill) and I don’t want to give her something hideous, but I don’t want her to think I’m some total plague-carrier either…
The Beast, Merthyr
Angel Eleanor: You can still be infectious even when you’re not having an outbreak. You have to tell her because, while it may just seem a nuisance to you, a woman with herpes can give her baby a fatal brain infection. Your best bet is to see a sexual health doctor who can give you both an MOT while tackling your herpes.
Angel Steph: You should avoid skin-to-skin contact if you have any signs or sensations warning you of a breakout. If you have any suspicion about it, use a condom and put it on before your penis.
Dear Angels, I’ve started going for manicures and facials recently. Does this just seem irredeemably bent, or would you ladies appreciate the effort?
Toby Treacher, Liverpool
Angel Jen: Bent. The only time you can do anything like that is with your girlfriend. And, even then, it’s more of a laugh. Some things in life are reserved for women and gay men and professional preening is one of them. I have no justification for this, but it’s just my opinion. I have gay friends that have facials and, yes, they have great skin. But if my boyfriend went for one it would completely put me off. Sorry, it’s just not manly.
Angel Steph: I take it you don’t have a girlfriend. Let’s be clear, we appreciate trim, clean finger nails and a groomed appearance, but taking more care over your appearance than us is going beyond metrosexual. Nothing turns a girl on more than a man’s man, rough hands and rugged stubbly jawlines included.
Dear Angels, I’ve been dating a new girl in her early 30s. She’s very attractive and looks really ‘filthy’ (in a good way). But she says she’s never had an orgasm. Can some people just not have them? Or is it psychological? And do I have to resign myself to a one-sided sexual relationship?
Anon, via e-mail
Angel Eleanor: There is such a thing and it’s called primary anorgasmia. Causes are vast, including stigma about enjoying sex, sexual abuse or lack of confidence. Actual physical causes are rare, but a sexual health clinic may be able to give more advice. It’s a bit narrow of you to think a sexual relationship with this girl will be ‘one-sided’ as orgasms aren’t the be-all and end-all. Your best chances of good sex are to let her relax, get her to trust you and don’t pressure her.
Angel Steph: It is very common for women not to have had an orgasm. Just because she hasn’t yet doesn’t mean you should write her off. Give as much as you receive in bed, keep an open mind and who knows what the future might bring!