Guns, brothels and football: If Snoop Dogg was president...
Snoop Dogg/Lion has once again reincarnated himself for a new music project. This time he's taking on funk under the guise of 'Snoopzilla'. Here's what happened when we met the man himself to talk "painting the White House black"...
The American Dream can take you from a nobody to a Cadillac-driving, champagne-splashing hyperstar in just a few years, as Snoop Dogg will tell you. Twenty years ago, Calvin Broadus Jr was spending more time inside a prison cell than out of one. On the rare occasion that he was the right side of the bars, he’d go right back to a world of gangs, drugs and guns on the smog-engulfed streets of Long Beach, California. Just a few years later, this twenty-something had transformed himself into Snoop Dogg, the world’s best-loved and most famous rapper, laying claim to the first-ever debut album to top the American charts and bossing his own record label.
Skip forward to 2012 and you’d have found him undergoing another transformation – into Snoop Lion, his new peace-and-love-toting Rastafarian persona – and recording his first reggae album, Reincarnated, in Jamaica. Not that he needed to; this is a man with album sales already in excess of 30 million, a net worth of over $110 million and the ability to send pictures of him smoking weed with Rihanna to more than 10 million palms in a split second via Twitter.
That’s right, not only has Snoop Dogg ridden the rags-to-riches American Dream rocket right to the very top of the entertainment ladder once, but he’s going to do it all over again with his second [EDIT: NOW THIRD, AS SNOOPZILLA!] coming.
Would you even hazard a guess as to where you’ll find him or what you’ll call him next? President Snoop, perhaps? A long shot it may be, but would you really bet your life on it? If an Austrian by the name of Arnold Schwarzenegger can go from bodybuilder to action hero to governor of California, why can’t a gangster-turned-rap-superstar? We found Snoop in LA to see what the U-S-of-A would look like under D-O-double-G…
PRESIDENT SNOOP WOULD… GIVE KIDS DOLLAR SKILLS
“Man, I was the class clown at school,” Snoop tells us from his studio in the laid-back Californian murmur that’s come to embody gangster rap in even the most remote corners of the planet. He sounds relaxed, really relaxed – something that definitely doesn’t surprise us given his 81-a-day habit (yes, really) of we-don’t-need-to-tell-you-what.
“I had good enough grades to pass, and I never failed, but I did a lot of clowning around. I was always rapping, dancing, singing… all kinds of bullshit like that. That created the character I am today, being able to speak and perform in front of people.” People like Cameron Diaz, who was in the year below him. “She was my little homegirl, getting weed from me.”
So, as a man who didn’t need to listen to a teacher to make his fortune but still appreciates how instrumental schooling is for success, how would he change the educational system if he were in charge of the most powerful nation on Earth?
“I’d make sure there were lessons in finance for kids. The biggest lesson I’ve learned with my money is basically not to be so friendly with it. When we get it, we love to take care of our family and our friends. But we have to learn to take care of ourselves and teach friends and family how to work for it like you did. That way, you’re not giving it away, but it’ll be earned.”
…PAINT THE WHITE HOUSE BLACK
One of the perks of being President Snoop is moving into the most famous residence in the country. The White House has been home to every American premier since 1800 and is filled with luxury furnishings reflecting the history of “the greatest nation on Earth”.
“The first thing I’d do is give the White House a paint job,” he says. “I would have to paint the White House black. I’d change the floor, and it would be a marble floor with a mink-and-silk interior with butter-soft leather seats and a bathroom made in crystal. You’d be peeing on diamonds. Yeah, black with white diamonds.”
It’s not just 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue that would get the Snoop treatment, though. Kiss your national anthem goodbye too, America… “I wouldn’t stick with that, ‘Oh say can you see’ bullshit. Fuck all that. It’s time for some new shit. I mean, I would have to write it with a couple of writers I know who would come over and do it. It’d be real big, real creative and make America feel right at home. Now, it’s so outdated. We need something that speaks to the people right now.”
…SORT OUT GUN CRIME
“If I had to outlaw one thing, it’d be guns. I’d outlaw them to an extent where you have to be qualified to own one. You’d have to pass a demeanour test to see how you are under pressure, and what you’re gonna do when the pressure cracks you. There shouldn’t be no need for automatic weapons to be in the hands of regular citizens,” says Snoop as a man who’s no stranger to them.
In the early days, before world fame put him on a straighter path, he’d been arrested for possession of a handgun and came close to a long stretch in prison after being charged and later acquitted of murder in 1993. Ten years later, he would be on the other side of the bullet as three shooters opened fire on his convoy travelling through LA.
“It’s just too easy to get a gun. I’m not just talking about walking into Walmart and picking one off the shelf, I’m talking about walking into the hood and buying one on the street. It’s a hot topic here, but they’re not putting any control on it, they’re still just talking about it.”
Also available from FHM
We have teamed up with 888games to offer you FHM Casino. New members will receive £12 totally free (no deposit needed) to try the site. There really is nothing to lose…join here
Girlfriends! Flirting! Sex!
If what you want is to meet your next girlfriend - or just a nice-looking lady to have some undercovers fun with - then look no further than FHM Single Girls.
More collections in Entertainment
Twelve golden TV sex moments
They shaped our young lives. And the contours of our pants
FHM and Jägermeister hit the road
FHM are teaming up with legendary drinks people Jägermeister for the road trip of a lifetime and we need your...
FHM’s 100 Greatest Games of All Time
We salute the best games ever made...
The 10 scariest games of all time
Be afraid. Be very afraid
The five biggest console releases of 2009
Brace your thumbs. It’s another killer year for gaming
Ten gadgets we (and the world) forgot
A goodbye was what these gadgets deserved long ago
10 films that should've been good. But weren't
The ones which let us down in a big way
Ten cinematic Nazis who brim with pure evil
Tom Cruise not included. Because he's rubbish
Ten films that only make real sense after the pub
When you’ve had a skinful, only certain films will do
Ten movies not to be missed in 2009
Reschedule weddings. Cancel bar mitzvahs. Fuck funerals
Ten remakes that beat the originals
Not just better – much better
The 10 best movie heists of all time
Stealing: officially big and clever
The 10 coolest movie speeches ever uttered
If only all these actors were in one mega-movie...
FHM’s festival preview: better than all the others
There are fields everywhere to get bollocksed in
FHM’s guide to your soundtrack of 2010
One year, 12 artists, an infinite number of good times
The Specials! Franz! Dre! Your soundtrack to ‘09
We’ve weeded out the tripe so you don’t have to
The London Astoria’s ten best gigs
They’ve shut it down, but they can’t destroy the good times
The FHM Top 10 celebrity meltdowns
Those high-fliers have so far to fall
Remember these? The 25 ad jingles you NEVER forgot
See the ad, buy the product and sing the jingle forever...
The 20 best adverts of 2008
Every genuinely funny ad from the past 12 months
The 10 best British TV shows of 2009
Sod The Wire, British TV is the real deal
Double acts: FHM's top 10 famous duos
Double acts: we take a look back at the 10 best famous duos in film, television, and pretty much everything in pop...
10 actors who would be amazing in the next series of True Detective
As HBO's True Detective comes to an end stateside (and for the legions of people watching it on the internet) we look...
Classic lip smackers
There’s great food and then there’s the kind of food that makes you sad inside. When you are full, but your...
FHM (and Ian Woosnam) take on America at golf
At 3.23pm on Monday the 4th of October 2010, FHM was sitting in this very office, nervously watching the small flat...
FHM checks out Wall Street
When most people notice a film is coming out their reaction is something like “That looks good, I definitely want to...
How to win at life with the best of FHMManFood
Our American steak-searing, bacon-loving, chicken-stuffing food pro DJ BBQ gives you the meaty intel that will take...
FHM’s Top Ten iTunes Festival gigs
Even if you’re not lucky enough to bag tickets, you can stream most of the gigs live on iTunes. Or just read our irreverent...
How FHM became a Hollywood star (kind of)
It’s 4am, it’s pitch black, and a half-asleep FHM is squeezing his car between a Sherman tank and a palm tree. This...
Guns, brothels and football: If Snoop Dogg was president...
Snoop Dogg/Lion has changed his name again, to Snoopzilla. Here's what happened when we met the man to talk "painting...
Jay Z's Run This Town and 10 other songs that aren't quite as original as they sound
Everyone's favourite Beyonce lovin' rap star, Jay Z, has sparked the wrath of a record label who reckon he's sampled...
OK Go’s new video will make your eyes feel drunk on awesome juice
OK Go have gone done another music video and, as expected, it’s smashed the internet to pieces like a (non-Miley-ridden)...
“Playing Mandela was without a doubt the hardest work I’ve ever done": FHM speaks to Idris Elba
FHM met Mandela star and Britain's most important actor, Idris Elba...
Relive the FA Cup Final with the top five greatest ever cup-winning goals
Five FA Cup goals that were better than Aaron Ramsey's screamer for Arsenal on Saturday...
See behind the scenes at FHM in ITV2 show The Exclusives
We're appearing on ace new ITV2 show, The Exclusives, where you can have a gander at what goes on in FHM towers...
Ten of the best… comedians
Spurious claim alert: comedians are the new rock stars. Justification of spurious claim: in the absence of anyone in...
The 10 scariest movies of all time as voted by an audience hooked up to heart monitors
The top 10 scariest movies of all time, as voted by the users of Play.com....
The sexiest pop starlets to be nominated at this year's Brits
The Brits are nearly here again, meaning a solid round-up of homegrown talent getting drunk and showing why we're awesome...
What happened when FHM spent 48 hours with former EDL Leader Tommy Robinson
Controversial EDL Leader Tommy Robinson has today announced he's leaving the political group. Here's what happened...
22 comics that should be given the Sin City movie treatment
As exclusive character pictures of the next Sin City instalment are released, FHM looks at 22 other mindblowing comics...