On Sunday March 30, FHM got to sit in the same room and drink copious amounts of Jameson's with the likes of Tom Cruise, Margot Robbie and Arnold Schwarzenegger.
With heads pounding and feet aching, here's everything we learned that you won't read in the papers...
01 No awards ceremony is complete without an opening number. Host James Nesbitt has a lovely singing voice.
02 Emma Thompson is bloody hilarious.
03 Stephen Fry can say whatever he wants and still receive rapturous applause. Even, it turns out, the word pre-cum.
04 James McAvoy's nickname for Hugh Jackman is Hugo Boss.
05 Top Gun 2 is happening.
06 James Nesbitt became the voice in our heads when he proclaimed "Margot Robbie. Holy shitballs" after she accepted her Best Newcomer award.
07 After watching a tape of clips spanning his awesome career, Hugh Jackman said, "That showed a lot of action and very little dialogue. Kind of like my wedding night."
08 Being in the physical presence of Kate Beckinsale may cause excessive sweating.
10 Shaun of the Dead premiered 10 years ago on March 29, 2004. When Edgar Wright pointed this out, everyone took a pained swig.
11 Arnie really does give a cracking speech.
12 You know when you get so drunk you throw a shoe across the dance floor and give someone a running jump hug? That's called getting "James McAvoy'd"
EMPIRE 25th AWARD: The Legend of Our Lifetime
EMPIRE 25th AWARD: The Action Hero of Our Lifetime
EMPIRE ICON (presented by Jameson Irish Whiskey)
EMPIRE INSPIRATION (presented by Mazda Motors UK)
BEST MALE NEWCOMER (presented by Tresor Paris)
Aidan Turner - The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug
BEST FEMALE NEWCOMER
Margot Robbie - The Wolf Of Wall Street
BEST COMEDY (presented by Magic 105.4)
Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa
The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
BEST SCI-FI/FANTASY (presented by MediCinema)
The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
Michael Fassbender - 12 Years A Slave
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Sally Hawkins - Blue Jasmine
BEST BRITISH FILM
The World’s End
Emma Thompson - Saving Mr. Banks
Jameson BEST ACTOR
James McAvoy - Filth
BEST DIRECTOR (presented by Air New Zealand)
Alfonso Cuarón - Gravity
BEST FILM (presented by Sky Movies)