In honour of today's release of star studded 'labour of love' film Jackboots on Whitehall, featuring Ewan McGregor, Rosamund Pike and some hot Nazi girl puppets, FHM seized the opportunity to torment it's intern just seven short hours after it had crawled into bed clutching a slice of ham and pineapple pizza.
No, this girl hasn't been on the wacky baccie, nor is she the world's first special needs pilot. This is what FHM does to it's interns. It fills them up with vodka at the FHM party, then packs them off at 9 in the morning to fly through the air with the greatest of ease in a vintage biplane. Unfortunately other FHM employees (Tom Howard) are not as hardcore and got in late to work after they did a puke in the street.
After puffing up the escalators with sick in our mouths and three bottles of water on the train we were on Gloucester air field for a spot of flying, but not before we completely ignored every second of the Tiger Airways safety video. As the plane engine revved up we lagubriously sat back in a snazzy aviator jacket relaxed and ready for our hangover tour of the Malvern Hills.
Nazi girl puppets also on the wacky baccie
The lady flying the plane was a woman of few words, and after a couple of minutes in the air she simply said "You have the controls," which is apparently pilot speak for "You can kill us both." After a couple of minutes of screaming and some sharp drops in altitude we were flying a plane. Flying a PLANE.
Turns out Tizzy was pretty rock 'n' roll. She's lived alone on a hillside with an eagle, driven a stunt bike through a ring of fire, flown planes across the plains of Africa and tried her hand at penning a novel.
And all in a homosexual plane
And she certainly wasn't shy on the loop the loops either. At one point we had to radio to let her know that unless she wanted a face full of second hand croissant and strawberry daquiri she might want to calm down on the victory rolls, plus we were getting increasingly worried our face might just fall off with cold and apparently it's quite hard to make it as a journalist without a face.
Anyway, who gives a shit, cause we are now the proud owners of a Tiger Airways Fruit of the Loom fleece, so suck on that.
Jackboots on Whitehall is out on DVD on February 14, courtesy of Sony Pictures Home Entertainment.
To have a go at flying your own plane check out http://www.tigerairways.co.uk/