If you’ve spent any time on Twitter today you’ll be aware of several things. Firstly, cats are still massive on the internet and secondly, Ben Affleck has been announced as the next Batman.
The latter of which has caused the Twittersphere, movie message boards and office small talkers to go *cough* Batshit.
Mostly because they think it’s the worst idea since that time Justin Bieber decided spitting on his fans from his balcony was a term of endearment.
Here are the main reasons why people are pissed and why they’re wrong…
He’s already had his superhero moment in Daredevil and it was awful
You're right, it was terrible.Potentially the *worst superhero movie ever in fact.
It had a terrible storyline, Colin Farell leaping around throwing shit and saying god knows what, a thoroughly un-engaging big baddie and a script that might as well have been written by a six year old loaded up on fizzy drinks.
It was so bad that Affleck was awarded the Worst Actor at the Golden Rasberry awards, an annual series of awards that celebrate shitness.
But look at it from his point of view. He was paid a ton of money to dress up, fight crime and get it on with Jennifer Garner – nobody in the world would turn that down.
Yes, it was bad but, it was probably loads of fun to do.
Don’t hate the playa.
*Catwoman was actually a lot worse but is overlooked because Halle Berry looks amazing in it.
He starred in that so-awful-my-face-melted movie, Gigli with J-Lo.
Another absolute stinker. But, he was starring opposite his (at the time) long-term girlfriend, Jenifer Lopez who he was living with.
If your superhot girlfriend asks you to star in a film opposite her, you do it. No matter how shit the film is.
He didn’t make this for us. End of argument.
He’ll never be better than Christian Bale
Sorry? Christian Bale was the worst thing about the recent Batman movies. He was overacting, didn’t look like he was having fun and had the most continuity defying yet consistently annoying voice ever committed to celluloid.
The great thing about those Batman movies were Christopher Nolan’s jawdropping set-pieces, Anne Hathaway and awesome people like Heath Ledger, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Tom Hardy, Morgan Freeman and Michael Caine. And the Bat Pod.
Never the Bale-meister.
Nobody will ever be a better Joker than Heath Ledger
The only way that this would be a constructive addition to this argument is if this Batman movie is going to be Ben’s Eddie Murphy moment where he plays every single character. We sincerely doubt that this will happen.
But for the record, Heath, god rest his soul, was a great Joker. But he wasn’t the best Joker ever. This man was:
*Look at his badly disguised moustache.*
Plus, everyone hated the idea of Heath Ledger as Joker when it was announced. Look how silly you all look now.
It’s ruining all of the good work that Christopher Nolan put into making Batman serious again
No matter how you dress it up or how much shadowy lighting you use this will always be a film about a millionaire that dresses up as an S&M bat.
It’s a ridiculous concept. Period. Just be happy and enjoy the explosions.
Actually this would be pretty awesome.
Words: Jordan Waller – follow him on Twitter: @JordanWaller and tell him he’s wrong or alternatively shout at @FHM