Tourists, we all hate them. With their sweaty brows, bad-fitting clothes and complete ignorance of the general locality, and yet, at some point or another we've all been one.
Here's how to avoid look like a hapless eurotrash backpacker when you're on your holidays.
First up, the essentials...
DO's and DON'Ts
DON'T: Get sunburn
Girls like lobster for dinner, not for a date.
DO: Buy a new cap
Use your holiday as an excuse to invest in one to keep the rays off.
DON'T: Forget local culture
Avoid the temptations of McDonald's and feast on at least one food you've never tried before.
DO: Down some Grappa/Limoncello/Sangria
Though not so much that you punch a barman and have to spend the night in the cells.
DO: Learn the exchange rate
It'll stop you from overpaying for taxis and dinners.
DON'T: Get your wallet nicked
Carry it in your front packet or buy one with a chain.
DON'T: Walk around with tacky souvenirs
We're talking flags, I heart NY tees and sombreros.
DO: Wear a brilliant watch
Well, you need to keep an eye on the time, don't you?
Watch, £355, Miansai at oki-ni.com
And the common sense...
SCROLL OVER THE TOURIST TO GET THE LOW DOWN
Shirt, £25, Sonneti at JD Sports; Shorts, £25, Nanny State at Bank; Hat, £28, Penfield.com; Sunglasses, £80, Police at shadestation.co.uk; Trainers, £100, Nike at JD Sports; Camera, £999, Fujifilm.eu
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