What a week it’s been: the sun’s been out, we’ve been shooting hoops and eating ice cream in the park, the new Routemaster bus went past our window AND, get this, a tasty-looking diner is being opened right opposite the office. You’d better be bringing your A-game, weekend.

WE ALL SCREAM FOR ICE CREAM

Ice cream Dephect
dephect, £44.99

We think it's grossly unfair that ice cream goes ignored for at least six months a year. "Oh, you've come crawling back to me, have you? Just 'coz the sun's out and you're feeling all summery. Well what if I'm busy now? What if I've made plans while you've been eating hot things and negle... oh, forget it, come here and get your slurpy tongue all over me like a dog going at a yoghurt lid, you big old licky bear, you."

ZEBRAS HAVE GONE WILD

Jansport zebra print
Jansport, £24.99

Imagine: you spend your whole evolutionary existence in plain old black and white, hiding in front of barcodes and helping people cross roads; you finally add some flamboyant colouring to your outfit, and some bastard turns you into a backpack. It's like an Alanis Morissette song for the equine world. A bit.

BE YOUR OWN ANIMAL

Apliiq
Apliiq, from $17

Sticking with animal prints, this new site enables you to create and customize your own T-shirt, jumper or hoody, and add any print of your choice, wherever you want it. It's ace, weirdly addictive, and a bit like the creation process in Subway, but in Kruger National Park. "No sweetcorn. Yep, double cheese. Ooh, give me a bit of that springbok rump on my shoulder. Lovely."

THIS T-SHIRT IS ALL GEOMETRIC AND STUFF

Fenchurch block T-shirt
Fenchurch, £18

Geometry is EASILY in our top three branches of mathematics. Last time we got into a discussion about Pythagorean theorum and Eucid's parallel postulate we had to go for a little lie down (in our perfectly symmetrical bedroom).

DER KAISER OF TRAINERS

Adidas Originals Beckenbauer
Adidas Originals, £65

As if being named after the inventor of the libero role isn't enough (come on, inventing your own role is as cool as it gets, right?), these Adidas Beckenbauers will be so disciplined and dominant they'll kick all your other unruly footwear into shape. At the moment, the bottom of our wardrobe looks like a centipede has stepped on a landmine, but add a pair of these and everything will be lined up every morning like a footwear army on parade day.