LOL, Donald Trump Doesn't Eat 2,672 Calories At McDonald's, It's "Only" In The High 1,000s

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For those of you who didn't catch the news on Donald Trump's go-to McDonald's last week, no worries! We'll go ahead and recap the details before discussing the, erm, strange new details. Man, the further we get into this guy's presidency, the more "delightful" he gets. Corey Lewandowski and David Bossie, the former campaign manager and former deputy campaign manager for Trump, wrote about the president’s typical fast food order in their new book, Let Trump Be Trump. According to an excerpt obtained by the Washington Post:

"Trump’s appetite seems to know no bounds when it comes to McDonald’s, with a dinner order consisting of 'two Big Macs, two Fillet-O-Fish, and a chocolate malted.'"

Hold on one second, we're just letting that information wash over us — slowly. We're really trying not to make mention of his blatant body/fat shaming in the media, but it's proving difficult. OK, we're back. Well, guys, that's one helluva McDonald's order. We're really curious as to how he fits it all in stomach when he's already so full of sh*t. The man truly is a miraculous beast. Inspiring, really! Almost as moving as his small loan of a million dollars.

A number of publications, including HuffPo decided to crank the numbers on what Donald's go-to McDonald's order would look like calorically — "Trump’s dinner alone comes out to a minimum of 2,672 calories, and that’s only if he orders a small shake. " We all know he's not ordering the small shake, c'mon. A man with that much personality? Please, he's large and in charge and so are his shakes!

Now that you're all caught up with what we're calling,"McDonald's Gate", Corey Lewandowski decided to backtrack with a weak-ass justification for Trump's Mickey D's order. Why are we not surprised? Can't this man and his supporters just own up to their sh-t? It's just McDonald's! Can you at least give us this, please? Sigh, no dice, we're afraid. In an interview with CNN on last week, Lewandowski explained:

"He never ate the bread, which is the important part," he said. "Was I concerned? No."

Bread or no bread, a 71-year-old man shouldn't be eating that much McDonald's. Also, is anyone going to address the fact that it's super freakin' weird to eat a Big Mac without buns? Why not just order a single Big Mac and fries and call it a day ...like a normal person? Just in case you guys were curious, even with the buns the meal contains at least 1,880 calories.

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